Love as a motivator

Paro, a middle-aged woman does the household errands in a posh locality of Mumbai to make a living. She had a struggle some time bringing up her kids single handedly after losing her husband at a young age. Paro says she loves God and keeps on chanting his name while doing the cleaning and other chores at her employers’ places. She is taken very good care of by one of the families she works with and is treated with a lot of care and respect. This employer doesn’t hesitate to say that she is like his mother and feels happy to put a piece of sweet in her mouth.

Paro, in return, does not think twice before doing any extra work at this employer’s house, does not demand a hike in salary, comes to work even at 9PM, all out of her own choice saying that he treats me like his mother, why can’t I do a little for him like I do for my son.

I just wish to put forth two points here-

1.       Love, respect and care can go a long way in motivating an employee and gaining his loyalties. A human touch can do wonders in this fast track life. Love begets only love.

2.       Self-actualization can be a poor man’s motivator too. It is not necessary that someone has to first make money, receive accolades and then he will think of the higher self.  At least the lady mentioned above proves otherwise. Connecting with the higher self can actually increase one’s output at work and create happiness too.

Let’s love ourselves and those around us to create a happily productive environment.

 

Have a lovely weekend!

New job avenues for the good ones

I read an interesting news in the Economic Times on 9th April 2013 titled 'Taking Care of Your Granny? Keep at it, You May Land a Job'. It talked of new job prospects for candidates who know how to take care of their grandparents or the elderly, along-with some other opportunities. It was for jobs with a start-up into eldercare/new age old age home. I felt happy to read that in today’s times when all we hear about is the need for street smart and -------- people, there is a career potential for people who know and can take care of their elders.

Can we pause here and think for a minute that if there is a majority of such people in the organization who have-

• good values 
• love and compassion for elders/ others 
• patience to listen to others  
• ability to forgive or let go 
• mental space for others 
• accommodating nature, etc.

the workplace shall become a healthy and blossoming place; there shall be lesser room for office politics, individual egos and personal battles and hence the stress levels shall also go down. Team spirit and individual morale shall be high and thus the organization’s flag shall also fly high.

Let us make an individual effort to treat others well and uphold the basic human values and see how goodness multiplies and comes back. Let's truly believe in the goodness of goodness:)

Have a lovely weekend!

Woman workforce post maternity

While we were having lunch during a training session, by chance the table on which I was eating was occupied by all young women. One of them was married and was dissuading her female colleagues to pursue a career post marriage citing these reasons-

 

• It is too difficult to manage so many fronts- home, work, spouse & kids, self etc. especially if there is no support system at home like a mother-in-law or mother or someone else to take on the responsibility at home.
• Men at work take them to be a threat.
• There are ego clashes at home.

She concluded saying that it will be better if men and women stick to their traditional roles.

None of us could digest what she said or agree with her fully. Nevertheless, a few ideas about corporate initiatives to retain woman workforce and help them maintain work life balance came to my mind after listening to her.

1.       Crèches & nurseries for toddlers and young kids- Some of the IT majors have already started these, and the concept is quite well accepted in developed countries where women have been working.

2.       Play schools.

3.       Schools for children of employees with transportation facilities.

4.       Flexi-hours, work from home facility – innovating systems & processes through which they can operate from their homes.   

5.    Refresher & up-gradation training for sharpening skills & enhancing knowledge post maternity break; nomination of such candidate for some similar course.

 

While women take all the responsibility of nurturing lives, let us as a society , as employing organizations take some steps towards supporting & encouraging them to grow holistically, while we also get to retain a good workforce who keeps her loyalties towards us.

 Please do think about this and share your ideas.

When in stress, tell yourself- this too shall pass

In today’s time, stress seems to be an inevitable part of life.  Be it work or relationships,  there are situations that are difficult and strenuous to deal with. Yet at times I wonder if we have formed a compulsive habit of being under stress or performing better under stress. Maybe yes. Having said that, we can not close our eyes to the ill effects of stress on our body, mind and entire life. It not just a cause of many fatal diseases, but is also antithesis to the very purpose of our being- being happy. Is the purpose of life not to be happy? Yes, it is in all respects, what use is the wealth, fame and achievement if one is not happy. But how does one do this? Be happy despite all tension and volatility in work & people’s moods? Yes, it is possible and doable.

We just need to remember and practice two things-

1.Tell yourself that this too shall pass. No matter how difficult the situation be, it is difficult only for the time being; and it has come to you because you are the one who can handle it well. Even if the whole world including yourself has a doubt on your ability, someone up there has full faith in you and will work with you if you hold on to Him with utmost faith that in the end all will be well for you.

2. Strengthen just one relationship- the relationship with Almighty. If this one relationship is strong, rest all relationships and things will fall in place. And for this again, patience and faith are the key words. Let no problem daunt your relationship with God.  Share with Him every minutest thought and pray earnestly not just for resolving your hardships but for His grace. Come what may make sure this relationship is serenely unscathed.

Stay happy, be stressfree:)

Leadership & Parenting

The parents of a thirteen year old school girl came to know of their intimate relationship with a boy which was going on since one year. The girl was not performing well at studies as well. The school authorities referred her along-with her parents to a practicing psychologist. After having a few sessions with the girl and her parents, the psychologist said that there is no problem with the girl and she does not require counselling; the problem was with the parents and they needed counselling. The parents labelled the psychologist as a fraud one and did not go to her again.

The actual problem was that the parents of the girl did not share a good relationship with each other and had serious fights frequently. The girl grew up in such a stressful atmosphere and got attracted to the love showed by a stranger in whatsoever manner. She lied to the parents quite often because she was scared of them and their non-acceptance.

The point that I am trying to bring is that like good parenting, good leadership also certain basic requirements:

1. Being a good role model- If the parents or leaders say something else and do something else it will not leave any impact and no one will follow such parents or leaders.

2. Trust & Acceptance - Unless we have complete trust in someone, we will not share our innermost feelings and thoughts. And when we do not share these there is a communication gap leading to repeated errors which can be disastrous at times. People speak untruth because they do not have the trust that the truth will be accepted.

Acceptance of the other person's failures and flaws leads to his complete trust in us. No one is perfect, a parent/ leader has to give an environment and required resources including emotional / mental security to his child/ follower to reach excellence.

3. Empowerment- When every person in a family or an organization feels empowered in his domain, he will give only his best with full commitment and integrity.

4. No comparison & criticism- When someone compares us with our siblings or colleagues making us feel inferior or criticises us saying that we do not know or we are absolutely wrong , we either get defensive against the person we are being compared with or get into a no action zone. However, healthy competition & constructive feedback are healthy since they do not make the other person feel inferior and are objective in nature.

Let's remember that relationships are to be nurtured perenially. The person in a senior position can make a big difference in making the relationship a stronger and happier one.

Please share your ideas and experiences.

Apologies for this long gap:) Have a wonderful week!

Reverse Mentoring

I feel so elated on seeing an elderly person trying to learn working on a computer, using internet, asking a youngster to set some time to acquaint him with technology. The reason I feel good is that someone in late 70's and 80's is keen to learn from a person who could be of his grand child's age. It brings forth the following benefits:

-openness to learn

-receptiveness to new ideas

-accepting that one is not all perfect and even someone young can know some things more

-giving chance to a youngster to showcase his talent and thus boosting his confidence

-honest communication

-strengthening of mutual relationship

-reducing communication & generation gap

-helping the younger lot give their best shot

In terms of the corporate world, such a relationship is called reverse-mentoring. When a senior learns from his junior on the job, the concept of mentoring gets reversed & hence is known as reverse mentoring. A few companies, both Indian & MNCs have already put the concept in practice and are getting hearty results from the same. There are companies using mentoring as well as reverse mentoring between the same set of people where mentor becomes mentee in case of reverse mentoring, though there is no hard and fast rule to this effect. Looking to the skill set of an employee and the requirement of another employee in alignment with the organizational objectives, they are given the role of mentor and or mentee.

In context of reverse mentoring I remember the phrase - child is the father of man.
Heartening to see the wizards of the corporate world taking lessons from the younger lot and the capability of young talent.

Please keep sharing your ideas.

Happy New Year

As we come to wrap this year up, which made us go through many trials and triumphs, I wish to cease this moment to say thank you.

Thank you for your kind support, thank you for the trust you showed, thank you for your wonderful words of appreciation, thank you for your honest suggestions, thank you for catalysing my growth and thank you for being there.

May your reinforcement always be there.

May the coming year bring all happiness & God's grace to you & your loved ones.

Wishing you & your family a Very Happy & Prosperous New Year!

Reaction v/s Response

While communicating with people in all walks of lives, we come across various situations where communication comes to a standstill because either party gets into the mode of reacting.

Let’s have a look at the difference reaction and response can make on communication and relationships.
Reaction-abrupt actions or expression of thoughts in retort to someone’s words or actions. When one reacts, he closes all the channels of communication and the entire system of communication gets shut. Mind gets cluttered with negative thoughts and presumptions. It fails to be receptive. Reaction does not take one anywhere. The party reacting becomes out of reach and difficult to communicate with. This disrupts not just the communication, but also the situation and has a negative impact on the relationship of both the parties. So let’s learn to respond instead of reacting.
Response- well thought of and meaningful communication through words or actions.
Here are a few tips of learning how to respond:
-Take time before responding, if required 24 hours or more.
-Listen, comprehend and then respond.
-Keep yourself in the other person’s shoes and then respond.
-Exert self control so as not to react.
-Do not go on a unidirectional flight of negative thoughts.
-While you are on the receiving end of someone’s reaction, just stay patient.
-If the other person is over reacting, think that he has gone through a turbulent time and you are the first one to meet him after that turbulence, and treat him well.
-Before going to sleep, hand over all thoughts and problems to the Almighty and ask Him to handle the situation.

Your reactions & response to this post are welcome:)

Happiness- key to emotional health

If we need to run a few miles, what do we need? Energy, stamina, strength? Of course, else the run will be tiresome, painful, can rupture some tissues & muscles too. Hence in order to have a good run, one needs to have physical health; Similarly in order to have a good life one needs to have emotional health. Happiness is an important key to emotional well being.

How does one stay happy or emotionally healthy? Here are a few tips:

-Awareness about one’s thoughts
-Making a concerted choice to be happy
-Positive self talk & Repetition
-Silent sitting
-Owning the responsibility of one’s choices/decisions
-Introspection

The way we feel or behave is not for others, but for ourselves. So let us choose how we want to think, feel and be in all our engagements & relationships.

Some of the ideas shared in the post are from a television programme called Awakening with Brahmakumaris.
Your ideas and comments are a key to the writer’s happiness:) Please do share.

Happy Diwali

WISHING YOU & FAMILY A VERY HAPPY & PROSPEROUS DIWALI!