Faith in goodness

Quite often when someone who is not so close to me, goes out of his way to help me out without any apparent self interest, I find it difficult to believe and keep wondering that why in today’s rush life would someone put in any effort to help a stranger that too without any self- interest. But then I try to bring my wicked mind back to track, say sorry to God for doubting HIS make, that too for being good to me. Is’nt it sad that, when someone does something good without interest, instead of appreciating, we start doubting the other person’s intentions?
Then, I remind myself that God sends HIS messengers in the form of these people to help us out when we are on the right track. When we lose faith in the goodness of HIS creation, we are just mistrusting HIM and giving HIM pain.   

I further remind myself that even if there are 90 forces pulling us down, there still are 10 of them trying to push us up, and their synergetic effect is much more than that of the 90 negative forces.

If we have been cheated badly, it does not mean that loyalty does not exist; if someone has broken our trust it does not mean we shall not trust anyone anymore.

If negative forces were stronger, would’nt this world just come to an end?

This can never happen, because it has been planned and created by the most dexterous creator. Every event, positive or negative is a result of HIS plan for us, and is for our own benefit. So, have faith in goodness and HIS Godliness and move on. HIS most beautiful plans are yet to unfold:)

Remember to leave your comments.

Stress & Happiness

There are times when we come under immense pressure, and as a result there is a high build up of stress. And then we come under the influence of negative factors like -hopelessness, despair, frustration, anger, anguish etc. Let’s look at some of the reasons for this:    

• Repeated failures
• Exhaustion by putting in efforts without a ray of hope
• Unending delay in getting results/ desired outcome
• Too much work with impractical deadlines
• Too little work, all the time to brood 
• Lot of multitasking 
• Health issues 
• Strain in relationships 
• Unexpected and contrary outcome 

 How to handle such a situation?

[I] Short term remedies-Take measures to come out of the negative influence immediately so that you don’t go into clutches of negativity-

a) Remember that this will also pass 

b) Talk to a true friend/ confidante 

c) Take an immediate break if possible – watch a comic movie, programme 

d) Spend time close to nature 

e) Cleanse your eyes and pent up emotions if that works well for you:) 

f) Go for a walk, game

  

[II] Permanent cure 

An example that I remember here is- if you are sitting on a chair and there’s a pin in the chair hurting you, what will you do? Remove the pin? If you are not able to remove it, then? Then you’ll get up and sit on another chair. How do we relate this with stress?

If you can control the cause of stress, do it. But, if you cannot control the cause of stress, learn to control your response to it, this will always be in your control. How? Read on.

  

1. Identify the cause of stress—true cause is not the unexpected outcome or outrageous behaviour of some person; the true cause is our expectation from and deep attachment with the result or the person.

2. Look within- Once you’ve established that it was your own deep desire which led to disappointment, you’ll realise that the solution is with your own self. No extrinsic factor can control you unless you lose control.

3. Strengthen yourself-

a. Be determined not to give in to negative influences

b. Have a regular physical activity-game, walk, yoga, gym

c. Meditation- it charges up every cell of the body and helps a lot in mind control

d. Pursue a hobby, something you always wanted to do but could not find time for

e. Read something positive, motivating and energising

f. Remember that there is a divine planning behind everything, HE has HIS own plans for you

g. Help someone in need, it’ll boost your spirits amazingly and the positive charges between that person and you shall do a lot of good

h. Pray-it works like nothing else

i. Remember that we exist for a larger picture

j. Promise yourself to be happy in all situations. Read my earlier post on happiness & hurdles

 

Remember to leave your comments here, send your suggestions.

 

Ethics with the unethical

Dirty politics, the feeling of being used and misused by people for their benefit etc. are common in a work place (to some extent even in personal relationships). There are street smart people who know how to use every situation to their advantage and move ahead, while there are others who are sincere and dedicated, simple and honest- they are the ones who have problems in moving ahead and become a prey in the hands of vultures.

How does one handle such people? Should one hold on to one’s principles with people who have no principles? I am trying to answer these questions with the help of an example from the epic Mahabharat.

During the battle of Mahabharat, when Arjun comes across Karna (one of the opponents), one of the wheels of Karna’s chariot falls and he falls down and so do his weapons. He requests Arjun not to attack him since he was empty handed. Arjun, being a kshatriya holding on to his principles relented and started waiting for Karna to come back with his weapons. Lord Krishna who was the charioteer & friend philosopher and guide of Arjuna asked him to attack Karna immediately. When Arjuna showed his disagreement on attacking an unweaponed opponent, Krishna reminded him of how Arjun’s son Abhimanyu was killed with deceit and Draupadi was humiliated in public. Krishna said don’t apply principles with people who have no principles.

 The above can thus be applied as follows:

• When you are right, don’t be scared of anything/ anyone 
• Don’t take your opponents on face value 
• Don’t share your strategies with others unless they are directly involved 
• Don’t think about ethics with people who have no ethics when your objective is right

I wish to share 4 Fs told by Bhagawan Shri Sathya Sai Baba -
Follow your master (your inner voice)
Face the devil
Fight till the end and
Finish the game

Do send your feedback/ leave your comments.
HAPPY JANAMASHTMI:)

Happiness and Hurdles

I happened to watch a lovely talk show on Happiness & Hurdles on television yesterday. It was quite inspirational, so I further feel inspired to share a few points.

Success means feeling good, light and beautiful. Success means being stable in all circumstances, giving positive energy to everyone we meet. Success/happiness is not contingent on anything or anyone. Worldly achievements and relations do not make us complete. We are complete the way we are.

How to get this feeling of completeness?  

• Start looking  within.                                           
• Connect with your higher self.
• Remember that-
• Nothing happens to me, everything happens for me, for my growth.
• Obstacles are not meant to lower our spirit or give a feeling of failure; they are meant to help us find a way out-a newer, more innovative way; they come to show us the real path.
• Hurdles are meant to make us stronger, since more energy is required to overcome them:)
• Thoughts of pain, failure, comparison, criticism drain out our energy; let them not creep in. 

False notions with which we live throughout our lives:

• When something happens against my expectations, I feel like a loser.
• If I become so and so I’ll be happy; if I get this, I’ll be happy.
• I’ll be complete when------ happens.

 So fallacious. The truth is that we are meant to be happy and complete irrespective of our worldly achievements, relationships etc. This does not mean that they should be ignored, they should rather be given the best. 

We must remember that a tortoise is strongest when it goes within; it cannot be inflicted with any pain. Similarly, when we start looking inwards, we become strong and no external defeat can harm us. If we can love ourselves the way we are, everyone else will do the same.

So let’s stay focussed on our own journey with a lot of positive energy and vibrance, the paths will start opening up to take us to the destination.

 

Do share your ideas. Keep smiling:)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Values and modernization

Since a last few months, some of the leading national dailies are writing repeatedly about the changing social culture (or lack of it) and a drastic shift in value systems; I have been getting a chance to interact about these issues with close ones within and outside India, so, thought of adding a few points.

In today’s world modernization for some people means- 

• Doing things are antithesis to basic human values
• Seeking relationships without commitment or responsibility
• Deriving momentary pleasures without thinking of the effects
• Doing things that others do to be tagged as 'modern'

Reasons:

• Peer pressure
• Lack of communication with immediate family
• Lack of emotional support especially from family
• Lack of self esteem
• Loss of values
• Endless desires

  Effects:

• Loss of one’s dignity and self-respect
• Frustration  
• Further fall in self esteem
• Unending guilt

These effects could be life threatening. Recently, The Economic Times reported of a mishap that was a consequence of misuse of a social networking site in the USA. The case was- a teenage girl received nasty comments on her pictures by some of her so called friends on that site. Such was the implication of those comments that the girl committed suicide and lost her life. This mishap is not just a case of misuse of social networking websites, but also an example of all the points mentioned above.

Haven’t we seen a lot of Page 3 people ending their lives like this? Though they have all the fame and riches, live beyond the social barriers, yet they go into deep depression and end their lives. Why? Because there are things other than name, fame, money, glamour and short term pleasures. These are- true love, emotional strength, courage, family support, self esteem and confidence in all situations, last but most important, spirituality. If ones value systems are strong and communication within the family is sound, one cannot go astray in any kind of situation or peer group.

Modernization means advancement and not degradation of one’s values. A few examples of advancement- 

• Using a mobile medical van for checking patients and distributing medicines in the remote villages
• Having uninterrupted help line telephones/ call centres for emergencies
• Free education portals
• Reconnecting with near and dear ones across the globe at almost zero cost (I could reconnect with a close friend after 2 decades through one such site:))
• Using a plethora of information on the internet for the benefit of oneself and others 

Values are something that make us a true human being and help in refraining from doing those things after which we are left with a sense of guilt or resentment. So let’s be modern in the real sense with our values intact.

 

Please do leave your comments, suggestions and ideas; and do remember to subscribe:)

Surrender

SURRENDER- is it a meek person’s retreat? NO. On the contrary, only people with great grit and mettle can do it since it takes a lot of strength to surrender.

Surrender does not mean:

• Succumbing to adversities or failures

• Yielding to negativity of any kind

• Not giving our best

• Giving up and living in a state of inaction

• Running away from situations and or responsibilities

I remember a small but significant incident which happened over a decade and a half back. During our B.com II year exams, I did miserably in the final exam of Cost Accounting (my favourite subject then). Obviously I felt very sad because before the paper I expected almost cent percent and after the paper there was a dearth of passing marks too. A friend of mine came up to me and said golden words that I shall always treasure; she said -You did your best, HE will do the rest. It registered in my mind, and I also passed with decent marks. So, the simple definition of Surrender is- You do your best, let HIM do the rest.

The benefits of Surrender are:      

1. We are free of tensions

2. The ball goes in HIS court;)

3. We get what we deserve, not what we want

4. We have the satisfaction of giving our best shot

5. We start living in a state of bliss

Why are we not able to surrender?

• Attachment with fruits

• Attachment with situations, momentary pleasures/ gains

• False sense of doer-ship, forgetting that we are nothing beyond his instrument

• Lack of faith in God

• Lack of Divine Knowledge

How to surrender?

Lord Krishna has suggested the following different ways of Surrender in Shrimad Bhagvad Gita:

1. Forget the fruits of your actions

2. Leave the fruits of your actions to ME

3. Constantly remember ME and do your work

Always remember that:

• A doctor has to give all kinds of medicines that a patient needs, and not what the patient likes, in order to cure him.

• In order to climb the ladder up, one has to undergo various tests. Take all tests with a steady mind, righteous means and stay focussed on HIM.

• If HE can take you to it, HE can take you through it. Have faith.

• A flute gives beautiful music because it is hollow from within. Let us also try to be a flute in HIS hands and let HIM play lovely music through us.

So now, Let us do our best & let HIM do the rest.

Your comments, suggestions, questions are most welcome:)

Motivation for leaders

Recently, I was conducting a workshop on Leadership for a group of young, enthusiastic Managers. I was delighted to see their bright and bubbly faces gleaming with a lot of enthusiasm, waiting for me to come out with the next line of encouragement.

While discussing Motivation for Leaders, we talked about various ways of motivation, intrinsic and extrinsic motivators, de-motivators etc. and something highly motivating for me emerged by the end of the workshop.

I have always been able to relate to Maslow’s need hierarchy theory in my own ways; and have felt that it is possible for a person to be at all or any one or more of the five levels (as described in the theory & depicted in the picture given here). Someone who’s at the self-actualization stage could still have some physiological needs and vice-versa for all levels of needs. But keeping various levels of needs in consideration, how can one increase intrinsic motivation for oneself & others?

Simple- do and make others do the following things:

1. See dreams, chart a path for yourself

2. Have a vision and let no hurdle obscure your vision

3. Look at the larger picture-don’t act by looking at the tip of the ice berg

4. Aspire for higher level needs, aim at self actualisation - Someone who’s at self actualisation stage, would be mature, honest, and an able leader. His intrinsic motivation shall naturally be high & external motivators or de motivators shall play negligible role on his spirits. We must try ourselves and encourage others to look at something bigger and better.

5. Yearn for a holistic life

By the end of the workshop, in the feedback session, one of the participants said that he would go back to his location and immediately apply this learning on a teammate who was senior in age, worked well but lacked the motivation to do better since money and power failed to motivate him. The participant felt confident that this learning would help in motivating his not so motivated teammate. And this response was quite a motivational experience for me:)

Your comments, queries shall add to this motivation:))

Positive Attitude

Thomas Edison was 67 years of age when his lab caught fire and everything was in flames. He was laughing aloud and his son thought he had a nervous breakdown because his lifelong work was destroyed. Then Edison told his son “ Charles, there is a great value in disaster; thank God, all are mistakes are burnt and we can start afresh.” Within a week, he invented the phonograph successfully.  This is the winner’s attitude.

I’m sure no explanation is required about the need to have Positive Attitude. Let’s have a look at some of the effects our attitude has on our body: 

Negative:

• Creates harmful chemicals in blood
• Damages brain cells
• Increases chances of deadly diseases

 Positive:

• Creates chemicals that boost energy and happiness
• Increases life span upto 120 years
• Helps in fighting deadly diseases. Cancers of last stage are getting cured with PA and HIS grace.

But how do we change our attitude from negative to positive? How do we stay positive in the face of adversities? A few points to do so-

1. Have noble objectives, they shall inspire you to keep moving positively.

2. Power of repetition: Repeat self affirming messages to yourself everyday like, today I shall not be disappointed, today I shall look for good in everyone I meet. More on this in my earlier post on

 http://deepali-enlightenment.blogspot.com/2010/03/thought-management.html
3. Be the captain of your ship: Take charge of yourself as the captain takes charge of his ship under all circumstances. More on http://deepali-enlightenment.blogspot.com/2010/03/thought-management.html

4. Get charged up: How do we charge our mobile phone? It gets charged on getting connected to an electrical connection. How do we charge ourselves? By connecting with the Divine GOD through-

• Prayers, Meditation                                  
• Moving on the path shown by HIM
• Talking to GOD like we talk to a very dear one

5. Use Positive Words: http://deepali-enlightenment.blogspot.com/2010/03/management-of-words.html

6. Look at the larger picture:

• Remember that God has sent you with a divine purpose
• Don’t waste time and energy on petty things 
• Look at everyone as God’s creation and treat him with love and respect
• Forget and forgive
• Remember that it is between you and HIM

7. Leave the place where others are indulging in negative conversation like abuse, idle gossip, criticism etc., it’ll save you from negative charges.

8. Look at failures and problems as blessings in disguise. HE wants you to do better and knows that you can do it.
9. Read at least one page of inspiring book every day:
http://deepali-enlightenment.blogspot.com/2010/03/in-life-is-it-important-to-be.html 

10. Watch inspiring movies.
11. Always sit and walk with your back straight. It will strengthen your confidence and inner strength.
12. Smile with your heart, God blesses through your smile.

You do your best, HE will do the rest.

Do leave your ideas, comments, questions to keep me positive:)

 

Stress- effect of modern corporate culture?

Recently I met a senior academician for my Doctorate and we got into a discussion on the repercussions of mounting stress levels in the corporate world. Though we keep on reading a lot on the subject and the ways to beat stress, yet a few interesting points and questions emerged, which I wish to put forth. So here is some food for thought:

1. People working in most of contemporary industries have no family life. Well, they wake up with their blackberries and sleep with the same (the only time when they are home) to ensure that work is taken care of even at the oddest hour.

2. Serious physical, mental and emotional ailments at any age are quite expected. Are hi-tech gyms, yoga experts, meditation rooms, sports complexes within office premises anything beyond an eye-wash?

3. Working hours extend beyond 12, 14, 18 hours and even more. Does human body have an inbuilt robotic system? Further, are people working till bizarre hours some nocturnal species?

4. Pressure and politics are common weapons to get anything done at any cost. And these companies claim to be people friendly and have won awards for giving a congenial environment for a good work, life balance to their employees.

5. Is the term contentment (without being complacent) a passe’? Where will these larger than life expectations take us, and at what cost?

After all, we are here to live a wholesome life and not just mint vitamin M by compromising on any and everything. Please send your ideas and suggestions.

Entrepreneurship - beyond barriers

Last week, I participated in a Startup Summit organised by an NGO called National Entrepreneurship Network (NEN www.nenonline.org ) and a B-school - Indore Professional Studies Academy (IPSA). The purpose of the Summit was to provide a common platform to budding and successful entrepreneurs to interact with each other.

I got the chance of moderating a session on Cleantech Startups -Profiting from Green – Beyond Barriers. The participants were highly experienced, learned, dynamic professionals who took the plunge of leaving high profile jobs for the sake of creating a cleaner and greener environment and proving their entrepreneurial mettle. It was my first chance as a moderator and the experience was excellent. These guys are doing brilliant work – a) providing pollution free conveyance http://www.ecomovesolutions.com/, b) generating off grid power from unconventional resources http://huskpowersystems.com/home.htm c) manufacturing great power saving devices http://www.artindynamics.com/ . The ideas are really unique and can bring a radical improvement in the environment. Please do visit their websites.

As it happens with pioneers, there are some roadblocks -lack of support as promised by government, funding agencies; financial crunch (after exhausting personal resources), mockery and leg pulling by peers and so on. There are moments when one feels like giving up and going back to a job that promises uninterrupted flow of income specially when he is not able to fulfil a demand or requirement put forth by a family member. What should be done at such times?                                                                

Remember, that if you can dream it, you can do it. If you won’t believe in your dreams, who else will?  Never Never Never give up. Greatest of inventions have thousands and more failures to their credit. Every failure or crisis helps you stretch yourself and bring a solution and thus, takes you closer to your destination. These failures are nothing but messages that, there is a better way of doing it –just look for it and remember that someone up there is confident that you can do it better.

Finally, tough times never last, but tough people do. Moreover, nothing lasts forever- good or bad-everything will pass. But you will always be remembered for your good work and contribution to people at large.

Keep your spirits high. All the very best.